I guess we need to speak to the Vicar!
The Vicar’s job is to make you feel welcome and comfortable about your wedding day and to help you make decisions about the ceremony. Meet one of our Vicars from Oxfordshire, the Rev’d Rosie Harper. She explains the Vicar’s role in more detail.
I’m not quite sure why, but there is something daunting about going to see a vicar!
When a couple turn up at my doorstep there is a funny mixture of excitement and nervousness in their eyes. There really is no need for the nerves. I love taking weddings and will do everything in my power to make yours joyful and memorable.
The first time we meet my main aim is simply to get to know you a little. I hope we will laugh, and I hope I will hear some of the story of how you met and what you love about each other.
Making the ceremony run smoothly is my responsibility, but I hope we can talk together about what you want on the day. I will guide you through the range of options for the service and hope we can make it a personal and special experience. We may well do this the next time we meet.
There are some legal issues to be looked at when we first meet. It is now much easier to marry in a Parish church even if it isn’t in your own Parish. A special family connection with the church will usually make it possible. I’ll do my best to find a way for you to marry in this church.
If either of you has a foreign passport then there are some more legal hurdles, mostly because of immigration law, but I’ll help you with that.
The other question I need to ask is if either of you has been married before. Not all vicars feel able to marry someone who has been divorced, but many of us feel that there can be all sorts of sad and painful reasons why things didn’t work out, and there may well be a way forward.
There will be a form to fill in; date and time, names, addresses, parents’ names and so on and this is usually straightforward.
I’d hate to think people were apprehensive about meeting me. My aim is to help you have a wonderful church wedding and get to know you a little in the process.